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About me

Self proclaimed weird girl with weird feet to complete the package. I don’t mean to brag, but my old podiatrist said, and I quote, “You have the worst feet have ever seen in my 32 years in the field.” Size 9, narrow, slender feet with long dexterous toes, and I mean long. My second piggies make me wear a full shoe size bigger. I put the “toe” in peep toe shoes. Listen baby, these feet slap. I mean that in the most literal sense. They slap. Like on the floor. Look, they’re flat as hell, but I’ll be damned if it isn’t an adorable sound. I love to be barefoot and that’s great for puddle splashing, smooshing, grabbing, and more! I am able to do a lot of fun stuff with these oddly adorable tootsies of mine, but you’ll have to subscribe to see, only $9! One dollar per toe, buy 9 toes get 1 free! I specialize in feet videos, pictures, and custom tasks. You want weird? I got you. Toe hugs!

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